Letting go ceremonies are helpful to enable you to move on from a past situation which no longer serves you.
Divorces & Separations
Divorces and separations are an unfortunate reality in today’s Western world. They can be very traumatic especially if children are involved and affect us all for a long time in ways that perhaps only death rivals, and unlike death there can be no obvious closure. So a separation ceremony offers the possibility to move on and find your own niche and internal balance in life again.
It is preferable but not necessary to have the couple present. The reality though is that couples separate at their own speed so often this is not possible. Individual healing is possible in creating a ceremony as if the other partner were there or one personalised for your own letting go and moving on.
So whether you are two friends who are amicably moving on after realising you both needed something else or if you are in the middle of an acrimonious custody battle, a separation ceremony can be a helpful way of marking an ending and allowing the new to present itself. It takes courage and compassion to look the ending of time spent together in the eye and announce to yourself that it is time to move on. My role is to be there for you as you do so, to hold your hand and love you through this time of moving on. It involves both a diving into the reality of how you feel and an acknowledgement of Grace in your life.
It is also important to think about what unconsciously binds you together and see if you wish to let go of these vows, beliefs and habits.
Personally speaking, this has been one of the most powerful ceremonies for me in my own interfaith training and I believe the need for these ceremonies to be vital and needed and I am very sympathetic and supportive of this rite of passage. Spiritually I have grown and learnt a lot about myself through my separations.
Cost: $6000. Usually ceremonies like this can involve over 25 hours work in preparation, counselling and the actual ceremony.
Photo courtesy of Rev. Amanda Taylor-Carpenter
As with the other ceremonies I create this ritual to fit your needs and honour the religious and spiritual values which are important to you.
The naming of a child from a spiritual perspective is a vital job and to formally name your son or daughter helps welcome them into the world, on this earth and articulate to family, friends and the child itself the love, care and support he or she has.
A naming, blessing or welcoming ceremony can be a combination of some or all of the below. I find out what you’d like included and then we bring everything together in the most fitting order and create a flow.
- Acknowledging absent friends / family members
- Readings / Stories
- Songs / Music / Dancing
- Welcoming the child
- Meaning of the names
- Naming of the child
- Blessing the child
- Parents’ vows / promises / commitments
- Supporting Adults/Godparents Vows
- Grandparents’ roles
- Inclusion of siblings and / or other children present
- Presentation of gifts to the child
- Hopes for the future
Ideally, given the reality of babies in ceremonies, the naming will be about 20 minutes long.
Fees: $3000 for the ceremony
As with the weddings and all interfaith ceremonies, the funeral is created around what you wish to have in the funeral. I’ll do what I can to respect your wishes, whether it is a green funeral, only silence or any theme that you or your family wish to have. I will check with you when I produce a first draft of the ceremony that you are happy with every single word – and if you’re not, then I’ll make whatever changes are needed until you are happy. You have the final say.
Although I may not have met the person I am holding the funeral for I can still offer a personalised ceremony in tribute to them. I’m there to hold both the structure of the service, and be there for you as you pay tribute to your loved one. Sometimes family and friends want and need to participate in the ceremony, and sometimes family and friends don’t want to do or say anything other than be there. We’re all different and our needs are different.
Planning for the Future?
Woody Allen famously joked ‘there are only two things you can be sure of in this life; death and taxes’. Although we all seem somehow wired to believe that we will live forever, its good to write your own funeral in case of the inevitable happening. Then you can sound the themes and words that you would like to have happen as if you were there. If this interests you contact me for a consultation to help write your funeral service. I’ve written my funeral service and also my will and it has actually made me more alive and present today in my life.